Self-Introduction

Subject: Self-Introduction

Dear Instructor,

My name is Jickson Lim, and I am writing to introduce myself to you as a student in your Effective Communication class. Having graduated from Temasek Polytechnic with a diploma in green building & sustainability, I had done internship at fire command centre. I decided to further my studies in Sustainable Infrastructure Engineering (Land) at SIT.

I am interested in a career related to land engineering. I am able to communicate with a small group of friends when doing project. Back in poly days, I had informed my groupmates their roles in the project. Discussing about installing of energy-efficient lighting will help save energy and costs. Telling my groupmates to surf the internet and find the most energy-efficient lighting.

In terms of weaknesses, I am quite afraid speaking in a public. I tend to get nervous when I speak in the stage, couldn’t express well in the presentation. Might feel a shame of what I share in the presentation. When I get nervous, I might forget what I want to say in the presentation. I scared the audience will laugh at me when I present something wrongly. I am also a bit shy to speak and doing hand movement in the presentation.

My goal is to learn more communication skills in small group dialogue and group presentation, such as giving out information more specifically. I will make sure my audience understand what I am saying. I also hope to gain confident in group presentation. I will practice my presentation before hand.

Best regards,

Jickson Lim

SIE2016 Group 1

Comments

  1. Hi Jickson,

    Upon reading the first paragraph of your post about your internship, I think it will be interesting to know more about what the fire command centre is all about. Also, I found your sentence structure particularly in paragraph two to be a little point-form like. This makes the blog slightly less formal but on the other hand, very concise.

    Alike you, I have got some weaknesses in public speaking and hopefully towards the end of the course, we get to learn and improve on them.

    Warmest Regards,
    Arthur Sam

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  2. Hello Jickson,

    I can relate to the problems that you are facing in giving presentations, I am sure many of us here have similar issue. Fortunately, presentation skill is something you get better at with practice. Lets help one another and work towards it together as a class.

    Here are some feedback from me,

    You know our professor's name, instead of "Dear Instructor" you should address Brad by his name instead. eg. Dear Professor Brad , Mr.Blackstone.

    Like what Arthur mentioned in his comments, I also feel that the sentence structure is point-form like.
    For example,
    " I am quite afraid speaking in a public. I tend to get nervous when I speak in the stage, couldn’t express well in the presentation."
    I tend to get nervous and have difficulty expressing myself well when speaking out in a public presentation.

    Not perfect but something like that. Please correct me if i am wrong.

    Hope this helps,
    Amos

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  3. Hi Jickson,

    Zi Rui here. After reading your posts, I can totally relate to how you feel about your confidence on stage as I have the same problems as you. It is good that you have a clear career goals, shown leadership qualities for examples, you stated that you allocate tasks to your members and also providing ideas to them as well.

    However, there are some points to note.
    -In the beginning, you should begin with "Dear Professor Brad".
    -In the third paragraph, you mentioned
    "In terms of weaknesses, I am quite afraid speaking in a public. I tend to get nervous when I speak in the stage, couldn’t express well in the presentation."

    Perhaps you can change your sentence to "In terms of weaknesses, I am afraid of speaking in public and tend to get nervous on stage."

    Overall, the blog is detailed and I believe if we work hard together, we will be able to achieve our goals.

    Cheers!
    Zi Rui

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  4. Hi Jickson,

    The internship in the Fire Command Centre sounds interesting. Look forward to hear more about your tenure in there. However, i agree with what arthur has mentioned in his comments. The sentence structures in second and 3rd paragraph are too point form like.

    There are several minor errors in the following:

    - you may want to capitalize your course of study for your polytechnic course
    - "In terms of weaknesses, I am quite afraid speaking in a public." you may want to remove the "a"
    - "When I get nervous, I might forget what I want to say in the presentation." i suggest changing to "i tend to forget" instead.

    Overall, the introductory is easy to read and detailed. Look forward to working with you in class.

    Cheers,
    Xun Qi

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  5. Hello Jickson,

    After reading your post, I used to be in your shoes when i was scared to present myself in front of my class but eventually i overcame it by constantly participating myself in class presentation and even took up singing or drama club to further enhanced my presentation skills. Order the key to be better in presentation is to not think too much about it, count to the number three and just do it. Eventually, you will discover your mistakes and from there you can refine on your skills.

    Here are some of my pointers,
    1) In terms of weaknesses, I am quite afraid speaking in a public.
    " In terms of my weaknesses, I have speech anxiety..."
    For weaknesses, you can address to yourself and quite afraid sounded very informal but it can be refined by replacing with better words.

    2) My goal is to learn more communication skills in small group dialogue and group presentation
    " My goals are to learn....." (plural)

    Overall, lets work together to do our best in Effective Communication by lifting each other up to improve and work towards our desired goals.

    Yours Sincerely,
    Lewis Tan

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  6. Dear Jickson,

    Thank you for this fairly detailed self intro. You cover the key topic areas and provide examples in your discussion of a communication strength and weakness, though these are not always clear due to some problematic language use. You do tie the points loosely to your goals.

    As for language use, you have received lots of feedback from your peers. Here are a couple other issues for your close consideration:

    1) I had done internship at fire command centre. >>> (verb tense/phrasing) I did an internship at a fire command centre.
    2) I am able to communicate with a small group of friends when doing project. >>> (verb tense / phrasing) ?
    3) sentence fragments
    -- Telling my groupmates to surf the internet and find the most energy-efficient lighting.
    -- Might feel a shame of what I share in the presentation
    4) to gain confident >>> (wrong word form) ?

    We have a lot of work to do, but I look forward to assisting you this term.

    Brad

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